Disclaimer: I blatantly don't know them and this blatantly didn't happen because hello, it's an AU!!
Part 1
Ryan stared down at Linde and sighed. “Do you think we'll get any time on our own?”
Linde smiled softly. “Well, at least we didn't know Bam was watching us yesterday.”
“Yeah, but not being walked in on just once would be nice. I wonder what Bam did to make Ville that mad.”
“He cut his hair.”
Ryan frowned. “He did?”
“You didn't notice? He chopped it right off,” Linde laughed.
Ryan rolled onto his back, drawing the slim blond with him. “Wow, no I was kinda distracted by how angry he was, I thought Bam was going to pee in his pants.”
Giggling quietly, Linde nodded, sliding his leg over Ryan's and his arm round his waist. “Yeah, he did look scared.”
They heard a muffled cry and stared at each other in surprise.
“Should we ignore it?” Ryan murmured almost to himself.
“Ville would never hurt Bam, even that angry, Ryan, don't worry.” Linde blinked at another shout and cleared his throat. “Yeah, I don't think going into my room right now would be a good idea.” Ryan felt the press of something solid and hot against his thigh and breathed in slowly, just enjoying it, enjoying the knowledge that someone this lovely and this hot wanted him. He shifted his hips thinking about how far he'd come since first admitting he was bisexual to Bam and Ville and how strange it seemed to be falling for another guy. And he couldn't deny it, he really was falling for the shy blond. Linde groaned quietly and rocked a little against him.
“Lily?”
“Yeah?”
“Would you... I mean, could I...” he stopped a little too nervous to say the words.
“What Ryan?” Linde asked, lifting his head to kiss his cheek.
“Nothing,” Ryan sighed, biting the inside of his cheek. Why couldn't he say it. He wanted to have sex, that was simple enough wasn't it? But saying 'can we fuck' didn't seem quite right, and neither did 'can we make love'. Apparently it wasn't simple at all.
“Are you sure?” Linde leaned up on his elbow and stroked Ryan's beard with his other hand. He slid his hand down Ryan's neck and through the sparse hair on his chest down to his stomach resting gently just above the drip from Ryan's erection. “I, you know I...”
He looked away shyly and Ryan breathed out in frustration. They were never going to get anywhere thinking too much about it. Not like the day before. The only reason Bam had walked in on them was because they'd been kissing and had just let passion take them over. Neither one of them had spoken about it, it had just happened and again in the bedroom after, Linde had just sunk to his knees in front of him on the bed and sucked him down his throat.
Ryan groaned quietly at the memory, his dick jerking. Linde stared at his crotch and slid his hand further down into the small puddle on his stomach. He smeared his fingers in precome and lifted his hand to his mouth, licking delicately.
“Oh fuck,” Ryan gasped, watching wide-eyed. It was the most erotic thing he'd ever seen anyone do. “I want you,” he whispered.
Linde blinked at him, then smiled widely. “You want me, first time? Are you sure?”
Ryan lifted slightly and cupped the blond's face gently. “Am I sure? Are you nuts? God, I want you so much, Lily. Please?”
“Oh I...” Linde's eyes went wide again, and his mouth formed a small 'o' of surprise. “Well, do you want... or do you want me to...” He stopped and cleared his throat, blushing vividly.
“You in me.” The words came out of his mouth before he'd even made a conscious decision and Ryan blinked in surprise. “Oh.”
“Wouldn't it be easier to start the other way round?” Linde said quietly. “I like both.”
Ryan swallowed and ducked his head. Thinking about it, maybe it was easier the other way, but ever since Bam had told him that he was the one who got fucked, he had to admit, he'd been intrigued. Especially after hearing some of the things that Bam shouted when he was obviously getting fucked, the noises he made were really hot.
“No, I'm sure, Linde. I want... I want you to.”
Linde stared at him unblinkingly, eyes still wide. “I need you to say it properly.”
Licking his lips nervously, Ryan nodded. “Please Linde, I want you to fuck me.”
“I think we should wait.”
“What?” Ryan gasped, disappointment nearly overwhelming him which surprised him even more.
“Not long, Ryan,” Linde said with a soft chuckle. “I just want everyone out of the apartment before we do anything more serious.” He bit his lip and dropped his gaze for a second. “I want to take my time, make it really... really good for you.”
Ryan grinned suddenly. “No interruptions.”
“Right,” Linde replied with a relieved sigh. He smiled and rubbed Ryan's stomach, sliding his fingers into his pubic hair and tugging very gently. “But we could still...”
“Come here,” Ryan murmured, pulling Linde back down on top of him and kissing him. Linde sucked his tongue into his mouth and rocked against him gently, thigh pressing into his cock. Moaning, he slid his hands down the blond's back to clasp slim hips and pull him closer.
“Oh,” Linde gasped, lifting his head to smile at him. “Sit up, Ryan.” He sat back on Ryan's thighs and pulled him upright. Linde rubbed his hand over the smear of precome on his stomach and shifted, straddling his thighs, his erection pushing against Ryan's.
“Oh God,” Ryan murmured, staring down at their almost enmeshed groins. “God, that's hot.”
“It gets better,” Linde whispered, flushing again. He pressed their cocks together and wrapped his slicked up hand round them both, squeezing tightly.
“Oh fuck,” Ryan gasped. He'd never felt anything like it, slick hand on one side and the heat, hardness and softness of Linde's dick on the other. He bucked up into Linde's fist hard, groaning at the slide of skin all round his cock.
Linde's eyes fluttered and he moaned quietly, jacking them both slowly. He looked so sexy, Ryan couldn't stop flicking his gaze from their crotches to his face, tight with concentration and lust, his eyes glazed. Leaning back on one hand, Ryan wrapped his fingers round Linde's and squeezed tighter. The blond gasped and thrust up hard into the circle of their fists.
“Oh God Lily!” Ryan cried out. He pushed up harder, watching their erections slide up and down against each other, the pressure of fists and cock against his own dick getting too much for him. Heat burned in his belly and he thrust up hard again and again until Linde suddenly cried out, stiffening and coming all over their hands.
It was stunning and Ryan bit his lip hard, pleasure shooting through his body and exploding into his groin as he added to the mess with jerky thrusts. His arm slid out from under him and he collapsed down onto the bed, pulling Linde with him.
“Jesus, Linde that was... that was amazing.”
“Yeah,” Linde sighed. “And no interruptions.”
Ryan snickered quietly. “Yeah, makes a change.” Linde grinned and curled up half on top of him. It felt really good. He'd never really been one for snuggling but the warmth of Linde's lovely body was too nice not to wrap his arms round the older boy and sigh in satisfaction.
“I really like you,” Linde whispered.
Ryan's heart clenched in his chest and he had to swallow before he could reply. “I really like you too.”
Ville was sitting on the couch, knee bouncing, hands tapping his thighs. Dunn glanced at Linde and raised an eyebrow. They'd got Bam and Mikko out of the apartment but Ville didn't look like he was going to be moving any time soon, in fact he seemed barely conscious of the fact that there was anyone else in the room with him.
Linde grimaced and shrugged, taking his hand. “You sure you want to do this?” he whispered.
“Yes, very.” Ryan nodded, smiling at the look of concern on the beautiful blond's face. He'd had his moment of freaking out and- surprisingly- Bam's attempt at helping had worked and he felt more than ready to take things a giant leap forward.
“Ville.” Ryan waited for some kind of response but got none. He poked the singer gently. “Ville?”
“Huh?” Ville blinked at them, a vaguely confused expression on his face.
“Ville, are you okay?”
“Yeah.”
“You sure?”
“I was just...” Ville flushed and looked down at his feet.
“Worrying about Bam?” Ryan said knowingly.
“Yeah,” Ville sighed.
“So why don't you just go and follow him around a bit, make sure he's getting around okay?”
“Follow him?” Ville gasped. “He'd kill me.”
“He'd never know.”
Ville stared at them, a small crease between his brows. He said something softly in Finnish and Linde cleared his throat, turning very red before he replied. Ryan wanted to say something but he bit his lip instead.
“You're right,” Ville sighed. “I need to reassure myself.” He got up from the couch and disappeared for a few minutes. When he came back, he leaned against the doorframe. “Don't do anything I wouldn't.”
“That leaves us plenty of options then,” Ryan snorted.
Snickering quietly, Ville gave them a little wave and finally left them alone.
Linde was sitting next to him, hands clasped tightly between his knees. It was awkward again and Ryan scratched his beard uncertainly.
“Lily,” he started. His voice sounded weird and husky and Linde gasped quietly, shivering. “You okay?”
“Oh yes.” Linde breathed out slowly, shifting a little closer and sliding his fingers across the waistband of his boxers and then up his spine.
Breath shuddered into his lungs and somehow, he managed to stop himself from just lunging at the blond. He turned and Linde grabbed him round the neck, yanking him into a penetrating kiss that left him feeling pared away until nothing was left but need and desire.
He kissed back urgently, letting Linde plunder his mouth fiercely, loving how such a shy, quiet guy could be so passionate when he was turned on and the erection pressing into his own showed Ryan exactly how turned on he was.
With a gasp, Ryan pulled back, realising suddenly that he was straddling the blond, rocking into him wildly and he had no idea how he'd got there.
Linde breathed in heavily and licked his lips. “Bedroom?”
“God yes,” Ryan panted. Linde stared at him, eyes widening slowly. “What?”
“You uh... you need to get up.”
“Oh right.” Ryan coughed, feeling his cheeks heat up. Linde stroked his beard gently and he leaned in to kiss him again.
“Ryan.”
“Yeah?”
“Get up... before I carry you.”
Ryan snickered. “Sorry.” He levered himself to his feet and pulled the taller man up with him. Linde laughed, keeping hold of his hand to pull him into the bedroom.
They tumbled onto the bed in a tangle of lips, tongues and limbs. Linde's dreads covered them in a curtain of hair and Ryan ran one hand down the thick, soft cables, pulling the older man on top of him. He groaned quietly, running his hands over Linde's wiry body, revelling in the feel of strong muscles trembling under his touch and warm skin trailing bumps after his fingers.
“God you feel good,” he muttered against Linde's mouth. He shoved at both their boxers, eager for them to be naked, to feel the slick slide of their cocks pressing together as Linde writhed on top of him.
Linde reared back up, stripping out of his boxers quickly and grabbing a tube from the side while Ryan got rid of his own underwear. Lying back, he reached for his dick, watching Linde's naked form as the older man moved over the bed to kneel between his legs.
“Oh God Ryan,” Linde sounded a little choked and Ryan sat up.
“You okay?” he asked. Linde nodded but Ryan bit his lip, realising something suddenly. “Do uh... do you want to do this?”
Looking surprised, Linde cupped his face and kissed him gently. “If you had any idea how sexy you look right now and how much I'm aching for you, you wouldn't have to ask,” he whispered.
He smirked. “So that's a yes?”
Linde pushed him back onto the bed with a soft laugh. “Yes.”
“Will you please touch me then?” Ryan asked quietly. Linde smiled and leaned over him, sweeping his hands over his body until he was hovering right over him. He bent his elbows and kissed him before pushing himself back up and arranging his legs so they were parted and bent. Ryan watched breathlessly, his cock bobbing needily above his stomach in anticipation.
The closest he'd ever come to anal sex was when Nathan had pushed a finger into him whilst sucking him off and honestly, Ryan couldn't really remember anything about it because he'd been too busy blowing his load. So he didn't know what to expect but it didn't alter the fact that he seemed to want it, and desperately.
Starting to jack himself again slowly, he met Linde's gaze, watching the blond squeeze a thick, clear gel onto his fingers. The thought that he was going to be inside his body was hotter than he could have imagined even only a week before but for some reason, Linde and his desire for Linde had crashed through all his reservations.
Linde mumbled something in Finnish and leaned over him again, kissing his hip, his stomach and his chest before lifting up to stare into his eyes. The touch of slick fingers between his cheeks made Ryan gasp softly in surprise and he pushed down without thinking, taking the tip of one straight inside.
“Ryan!” Linde gasped, eyes wide with worry.
“It's okay,” Ryan breathed. And it was, he pushed back further, encouraging the slide of digit into his body and enjoying it unexpectedly. While it felt a little strange, it was good and wasn't uncomfortable at all. Linde bit his lip, still staring into his eyes while he started to move his finger. In and out, slowly penetrating him over and over until it just wasn't enough and Ryan was gasping for more.
“Lily,” he moaned. Linde echoed his moan, his face looking a little strained. “Please, Lily, I need more.”
Nodding wordlessly, Linde withdrew his finger almost the whole way and pushed back in with two. Ryan reared up off the bed, clenching his fist round his cock so he didn't come. He'd never felt anything so amazing, even with the slight discomfort of the stretch it was amazing. He felt filled and hot and his groin was pulsing with pleasure that spread out through every nerve in his body.
“Jesus,” he squeaked. “Lily, I think I need you to fuck me.”
“You're not ready,” Linde said with a concerned frown.
“Oh no, I really think I am,” Ryan laughed, surprised by his own eagerness. But Linde had a gorgeous cock, long and slender like his body and he needed it inside him.
“Ryan, trust me...” Linde continued to stroke into his body and hit a spot inside him that made everything fade away, leaving only the wonderful pressure in his ass, the rush of blood in his ears and the overwhelming climax that ripped through his body leaving him jerking against the blond desperately, helplessly.
“Oh my God,” Linde whispered, eyes wide with awe. “You... wow.”
“Lily, please,” Ryan panted. “I really want you, please.”
Nodding slowly, almost dazedly, Linde reached over to the side again and quickly found a condom. He ripped open the packet and, with shaking hands, rolled it carefully over his dick before applying more of the gel. Ryan sat up and ran his clean hand down the blond's side.
“You okay?”
“Yes,” Linde whispered. “I've never... that was the hottest thing I've ever seen.”
“Really?” He flushed lightly and kissed his cheek.
“God yes.” Linde cleared his throat. “I've never seen anyone react like that before.”
“I, well, it feels so good.” Ryan was stumbling over his words a little so he stopped.
“It usually takes a bit more getting used to, Ryan,” Linde said, smiling softly.
“What are you saying, I'm a natural?” He smirked and Linde laughed, kissing him again and pushing him back onto the bed.
“I think you are, yes.”
Linde arranged his legs again and lay between them, his cock sliding down the crease of his ass. Ryan groaned and spread his legs wider, reaching down to position Linde's dick against the entrance to his body.
“Ryan,” Linde breathed.
“Please Lily,” Ryan whispered. Linde shivered and suddenly moved forward, his cock pushing inside him. Ryan gasped, arching up. It felt tighter than the blond's fingers, harder to get used to the stretch but so fucking good he didn't care. He yanked at Linde's hips, pulling him all the way inside him. Linde's breath left him in a gush and he dipped his head, tongue plunging straight into his mouth.
Moaning, Ryan kissed back hard, clenching his fingers into Linde's hips, feeling the line of bone underneath. He pulled at him, forcing him to move, wrapping his legs round the slender man's waist as he thrust so he could rock up against the strokes of his cock. He could feel the movement of Linde's ass under his feet, the rolling of hips to push his cock deep inside him was so hot Ryan could actually feel his cock recovering already.
Linde lifted his head and stared down into his eyes. ”Okay?”
“Fuck yes,” Ryan moaned, pushing up so Linde could feel his renewed erection. “Yes, so good, Lily.”
Linde groaned and jerked hard into him. It sent a bolt of lightning straight through his groin and Ryan almost laughed he felt so fucking great.
“Harder, Lily.”
“Sure?”
“Harder!”
“God Ryan,” Linde gasped. His hips rocked uncontrollably, slamming his cock deeper and harder inside Ryan's body, every stroke firing more lust through his body until he was gasping for breath and desperate to come again.
Reaching between their bodies, Ryan started to jack himself again, hard and fast and as erratic as Linde's thrusts were becoming. He couldn't help crying out, panting, gasping, it felt so good, so fucking hot.
“Ryan, nearly, God, there...”
“Just a bit more,” Ryan begged. He was so close he could taste it. He gripped his lover's ass harder, yanking him into his body, tightening his grip round his cock at the same time.
“Fuck Ryan!”
“Yes that's it,” Ryan groaned, the pressure against his prostate and inside him, the feeling of Linde's body on top of him combining to send him plummeting over the edge again, coming hard, ass convulsing around the length of Linde's cock.
Linde's mouth dropped open in a soundless cry, his body shuddering, hips moving almost independently as they rocked harder into him and then suddenly stopped. Arms giving way, Linde dropped on top of him, panting harshly. Ryan wrapped his arms round his slender form and held on tightly, warmth and happiness suffusing his body and heart.
“Thank you,” he murmured.
“Are you okay?” Linde whispered.
“Very,” Ryan chuckled lightly. “That was amazing.”
“Yeah,” Linde sounded a little awed and Ryan tipped his head back so he could see his face.
“Really like you,” he breathed. Linde flushed and ducked his eyes.
“Yeah,” he whispered. “Really like you too.”
Ryan woke suddenly, strangely shocked to feel the press of naked body against his back and an erection digging into his thigh. He frowned and quietly slipped out of the bed without disturbing Linde. It wasn't the first time he'd woken up with Linde like that, but it was the first time that he had after technically losing his virginity and he needed to take a moment.
He snuck into the bathroom to take a piss and brush his teeth. When he was done, he stared at himself in the mirror. That was it, there was no going back, he'd taken it up the ass and loved it. If he was honest the only reason he was having a minor freak-out moment now was because one of the first things that had crossed his mind when he'd felt Linde's cock against his leg was that he wanted it inside him again that very second.
Linde had refused any more fucking the night before, even when the noise from Ville and Bam in their room had made them both so horny that they'd barely made it back to Mikko's room before their clothes had been half off and they'd been kissing and touching each other desperately. They'd come, accidentally, at the same time that they'd heard Ville scream Bam's name and then collapsed on each other in a fit of giggles.
Ryan started to grin. He'd never felt like this, never had so much fun and got on with someone so well, so quickly. And he'd never wanted to be fucked so much in his life. He almost ran out of the bathroom and back into their borrowed bedroom. Linde was awake and frowning worriedly so Ryan crawled straight onto the bed and kissed him hard.
“You okay?” Linde whispered.
“I will be,” Ryan replied, pushing Linde back on the bed and kissing his neck, pushing his dreads out of the way so he could explore pale skin and slender, wiry muscles, sucking gently at the base of Linde's throat until the older man pushed him back with a gasp.
“You will be?”
“Yeah,” Ryan grinned. “When you fuck me again.”
Linde frowned. “Oh Ryan, I'm not sure...”
“It's not too soon, Lin', please?” Ryan stared at the blond seriously.
“I don't want to hurt you.”
Ryan ducked his head and kissed Linde softly before lifting up again. He had a little theory about Linde and he was going to use it shamelessly to get what he wanted. Provided he was right of course.
“I need you to fuck me, Lily, please,” he said, his voice husky with desire. He was wrapped in naked blond and being kissed to within an inch of his life in a split second. Linde really seemed to like it when he called him Lily.
Hands stroked over his body, sensitising his skin. The blond seemed to know exactly how to touch him to make him shake with want. He kissed back urgently, nipping at Linde's lips and sucking on his tongue.
Linde pulled away with a gasp. “You sure?”
Ryan nodded and leaned down to whisper in Linde's ear. “I want you to make me scream.”
Linde muttered something unintelligible and rolled them over, sliding over his body, kissing a line down the centre of his chest, stomach and then down his cock.
“Oh God,” Ryan groaned. He was so hard, so ready, it was insane how much he wanted this man. Linde hummed quietly against his skin and kissed the tip of his cock.
“Hold your legs back for me.”
Ryan stared down at the blond uncertainly. “Huh?”
Linde's expression went dark and hot and his smile made Ryan shiver with need. “I'm going to make you scream.”
“O-okay.” Ryan swallowed hard and pulled his legs back, exposing his ass to the blond. Linde grinned and disappeared between his legs. He didn't have a clue what the older boy might be doing. Suddenly, he felt soft, warm wetness tickling the line between his cheeks. He gasped, jerking at the strange sensation.
Linde grasped the backs of his thighs and pushed deeper, licking across his asshole. It was one of the hottest things anyone had ever done to him and Ryan felt a whimper escape from his throat. It tickled and yet it felt so amazing, the strong slide of tongue across such a sensitive area just made him want to bite his lip, spread his legs wide and never leave that bed.
“Fuck,” he breathed as Linde pushed harder with his tongue and licked up from the small of his back to his balls and then back down to his hole again, circling round, making him shudder desperately, electricity shooting through his body uncontrollably.
“Oh fuck!” he gasped, bucking urgently. Linde pushed his tongue harder against him, strong strokes along his ass. His entire groin ached and his muscles were tense with heat and need.
“Fuck Lily!” His voice heightened to a squeak when Linde's tongue pushed into him, the wetness and slide of it wracking his body with shivers. He felt like the top of his head was going to blow off and Linde kept licking, tiny stabs of tongue inside him, and long, slow licks around his hole. He could hear himself panting and gasping and fucking squeaking, then Linde's hand wrapped round his erection and he screamed, head dropping back as lightning bolts of pleasure coursed through him and he jerked up desperately, coming harder than ever, flooding Linde's hand.
Linde lifted his head and wiped his mouth with a smug grin, he rubbed his come-covered hand on the sheet and slid up the length of Ryan's body. “How was that?”
“When I can think straight I'll let you know,” Ryan replied breathlessly. Linde chuckled quietly and kissed his cheek.
“You sound perfectly coherent to me,” he murmured, nibbling on Ryan's ear gently.
“Don't let that fool you,” Ryan chuckled, “I'm on auto-pilot after my brain melted through sheer fucking pleasure.”
“That good then?” Linde laughed.
“Oh fuck yeah,” Ryan exclaimed. “The only thing better would be if you fucked my brains right out of my head.” He rolled on top of the slender blond who stared at him wide-eyed in surprise. “Like now,” he whispered.
“Now?” Linde whispered, just the slightest bit uncertainly.
“Please Lily,” Ryan murmured, dipping his head to kiss the older man gently. “Please, I want you inside me so bad, I can't even tell you.”
Linde's hips jerked up against him, his hard length pressing into Ryan's belly and he slipped his hand between their bodies to grasp it tightly, stroking thumb and forefinger teasingly round the head.
“Bet you could make me scream again,” he murmured, kissing Linde harder.
Pushing him back, Linde slid out from underneath him and grinned. “Oh that's a promise.”
Ryan shivered in anticipation, watching the blond roll a condom over his erection and slick on some lube. Everything Linde did was hot, but the thought of him preparing to fuck him just made Ryan's dick try desperately to recover. He crawled into the centre of the bed on his hands and knees and looked back at the blond with a smile.
“Fuck me Lily.”
“Jesus Ryan, don't make me come yet!”
Laughing, Ryan shook his head. “Can't have that, sorry.” Linde moved behind him and gripped his hips, fingers digging into his flesh deeply. “Oh yeah,” he breathed, feeling the length of Linde's cock slide between his cheeks.
“I wonder how much of a natural you are,” Linde whispered.
“Let's find out,” Ryan said, pushing back urgently. He needed Linde inside him now, needed to sate the dull empty ache with a good hard fuck.
“Christ.” Linde's voice sounded strained and he shifted, the head of his dick nudging up against his asshole. Ryan grunted and pushed back hard. A flash of pain made him grit his teeth but he kept on pushing until his lover was all the way inside him.
“Christ,” Linde repeated, his tone bordering on hysterical. “Oh God, are you okay?”
“Very,” Ryan groaned, the pain had dulled to a slight burn and he dropped to his forearms, clenching epxerimentally round the length inside him.
“Ryan!” Linde gasped. “If you do that I won't be able to hold back.”
Ryan grinned. “Really?” He squeezed down again, harder and Linde jerked against him, pulling almost all the way out of him quickly and then slamming back into his body. “Oh fuck!” he cried out, pain and pleasure melding inside his body, inside his brain, his dick surging.
“Sorry,” Linde gasped, not pausing, just shifting slightly so that his next stroke pushed into Ryan's prostate.
“Oh. Fuck. Don't. Apolo...gise,” Ryan managed to grit out in between beautifully hard thrusts into his ass. His fists were clenched in the sheets and he pushed back into every stroke, eyes squeezed shut against the intensity of the feelings coursing through him. It was so fucking good, he could feel so much, the stretch around Linde's cock, the slide in and out of his body that made him ache and his dick throb and every time Linde hit his prostate, he cried out at the fucking insanity of how good it felt.
“Oh God Ryan,” Linde whimpered. “You feel so good.” He dropped down over Ryan's back, burying his face in the back of his neck and licking his skin. Ryan groaned.
“You too,” he gasped. “Now fuck me harder.”
“Jesus!” Linde clutched his hips tighter and plunged into him, pelvis smacking hard into his ass.
“Oh God yes like that!” Ryan shouted helplessly. Linde slammed into him again and again, short, hard, jerky and fucking awesome. “Oh fuck I think I'm coming.”
“Yes,” Linde whispered. “I need to feel you come for me.” He thrust harder, deeper and Ryan cried out again, clenching down tightly. “Oh God, Ryan!” Linde jerked and bit down on his neck.
Pain shot through his shoulder and down his spine, intensifying everything. Suddenly, he was coming and Ryan felt like every cell in his body was melting into his orgasm.
“Oh God Ryan you're bleeding,” Linde gasped.
“Don't care, feels good!” Ryan panted, shuddering against his lover, waves of pleasure still overwhelming him. Linde licked his neck and moaned softly.
“So hot, oh God,” Linde breathed, losing all rhythm and pounding against him until he started to shake and held himself deep, sucking on Ryan's neck hard. “Oh God!”
Ryan slid forward slowly, taking his lover with him, until he was lying flat. He was exhausted and decidedly sore but he didn't care, he'd never had sex like that and the trickle of blood he could feel making its way down his shoulder just made him smile. He'd never thought pain could feel so good but Linde biting him had felt not only good, but like he was being claimed or something.
“Lin',” he whispered.
“Yeah?”
“Don't freak out.”
“About what?”
“The blood... the biting, I liked it.”
“Yeah?” Linde sounded uncertain.
“Yeah,” Ryan nodded and reached back to take Linde's hand.
“Me too,” Linde whispered. “I didn't mean to make you bleed but... I liked it too.” He pressed a kiss to Ryan's bite mark and lifted himself up, slowly pulling out of Ryan. He hissed quietly, wincing at the twinge of discomfort. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” Ryan breathed, turning over carefully to look up at the blond. “That was, it was amazing.” He grinned and Linde smiled slowly back at him. With another small wince, Ryan sat up and pulled the older man close, kissing him softly. “I hurt all over, but I don't care okay? It was worth it and it feels good.”
Linde nodded. “Okay,” he whispered.
“Okay,” Ryan grinned, “Now can you help me up? I need to pee and I bet we have to wait for Bam and Ville.”
Linde giggled softly and nodded. “Probably.”
He got up and found Ryan's boxers and t-shirt and Ryan watched him, warmth spreading through his chest and stomach. He wanted to blurt out his feelings but it was too soon, he barely knew the older man, saying 'I love you' would just scare him off and besides, it was stupid, he couldn't possibly have fallen for Linde already. Instead, he grabbed Linde's wrist when the blond held his clothes out to him and pulled him close, kissing him desperately.
Linde pulled away, breath hitching. “Yeah,” he whispered and buried his face in Ryan's neck.
Ryan swallowed hard and forced himself to smile. “Come on then let's go annoy the boys.”
“Okay,” Linde said, his smile equally bright. He pressed a kiss to Ryan's forehead and helped him get dressed so sweetly that Ryan's smile became genuine and he sighed happily, letting Linde half carry him out of the bedroom to the bathroom.
“Fuck,” he said, turning on his heel and stalking out of the room. He walked up to Mikko's bedroom door, shaking with anger. Was Ville right? Was he really projecting his own fear onto Bam?
Surely they didn't really expect him to think getting married was a good idea though? It was stupid, as stupid as him thinking about moving to Helsinki with Bam.
Sighing, Ryan slid down the wall into a crouch, hanging his head tiredly. Maybe Ville had hit too close to home. And now he'd hurt Linde as well as Bam. He could hear quiet crying inside the bedroom and his heart clenched. What the hell did he do now?
Pushing himself back up, Ryan quietly opened the door and bit his lip. His blond lover was sitting on the floor in front of the bed, his dreads hiding most of his face, tears coursing down his cheeks.
“Lin', I'm sorry,” he whispered.
“Don't be,” Linde said with a sniff, rubbing his face roughly. “I'm being stupid. I shouldn't be crying just because you don't love me. It's only been a week after all.” He smiled tremulously, tears still escaping his eyes and Ryan felt his throat close up. He shook his head and knelt in front of Linde, putting a gentle hand on his knee.
“No, that's not it at all. I know it's only been a week and that's why I'm being such a dick.” Ryan stopped and sighed. “Damn it!”
“Ryan, I don't... it's okay.”
“No, it's not,” Ryan said with a grimace. “Ville was right. I am scared okay? I'm scared because I've never met anyone like you before, never felt anything like this and yes, it's only been a week and we've got less than a month left.” Ryan felt his eyes start to sting and he swallowed hard.
“What are you saying?” Linde asked softly.
“I'm saying what the hell happens to us when I go home again, Lin'?”
“I don't know,” Linde whispered, reaching out to take his hand. “Maybe we should... do you want to stop?”
Gripping the blond's hand tightly, Ryan closed his eyes. “I don't think I can.”
Linde tugged on his hand gently and Ryan opened his eyes again, letting the older man pull him into his arms. “I've fallen in love with you,” Linde whispered. “I know it's insane but I have. I don't know what's going to happen when you go home again but I don't want you to get hurt.”
“What about you?” Ryan asked quietly, despite his heart pounding happily from Linde's soft declaration.
“What about me what?”
“Getting hurt,” Ryan said. “I don't want you to get hurt either.”
“What do we do then?” Linde asked. “You leaving is going to hurt me no matter what happens now Ryan, I can't help that but we can stop if it makes it easier for you.”
“It doesn't make anything easier Linde, I can't spend three weeks with you and not be with you,” Ryan whispered hoarsely. He shrugged and sighed quietly. “I love you.”
Linde buried his face in his neck and held on tight, breath hitching quietly. Ryan stroked his dreads gently and leaned into him, taking comfort in the embrace. Why did it have to be so hard?
“I don't want to stop Lin', okay?” he said quietly. “Can we pretend I'm not going home and just enjoy this? I know it's stupid but I don't want to think about leaving.”
“It's not stupid,” Linde said, lifting his head and giving him a soft smile. “I'm in denial too.”
Ryan half-laughed even though he really felt like he wanted to cry. A sudden burst of hysterical laughter from the sitting room made them both jump and Ryan sighed. Linde wasn't the only one he needed to apologise too.
“You ready to go back out there?” he asked, pressing a gentle kiss to Linde's forehead.
“No,” Linde said with a sniff, “But maybe we should.”
“Yeah.” Ryan got up and held out his hand, gently tugging the blond up with him. They wrapped their arms round each other and quietly headed back to the sitting room.
Ryan followed Linde into Mikko's bedroom, clinging tightly to his hand, At the foot of the bed, the blond turned and cupped his cheek, stroking his thumb gently over Ryan's mouth.
He stepped closer, slipping his arms round Linde's waist and the older man bent his head, kissing him, the press of lips parting his mouth for his lover's tongue to slide inside.
Moaning quietly, Ryan shifted closer, needing to feel Linde's slim body against his. He pushed up his lover's t-shirt, stroking the smooth skin of his back, and down under his waistband.
Gasping quietly, Linde pulled back, kissing him gently once.
“Lin'?” Ryan murmured.
“Clothes,” Linde said, peeling off his t-shirt and unbuckling his belt. Ryan watched the slender blond strip off, his dick hardening, groin tight with need. Linde was so beautiful, so sexy... so sweet, he couldn't bear the thought of having to leave him in a couple of weeks.
“Hey,” Linde whispered. “No frowns, heila.” He gently rubbed his thumb between his eyebrows. “We're going to enjoy our time together, okay?”
Ryan sighed and managed a smile. “Okay.”
Linde moved up against him again, kissing him, hands clutching his shoulders. Sliding his tongue over slim lips, Ryan pushed between them, licking into his lover's mouth then sucking on his bottom lip gently.
Linde pulled back again. “Ryan, clothes.”
“Sorry,” Ryan whispered, taking a step back and pulling his t-shirt over his head. Before he could start on his pants, Linde reached out, hooking a finger in his waistband and tugging him forwards. He placed a hand flat on Ryan's chest and pressed his fingers into his skin. Leaning in, Linde kissed his neck, sucking softly, letting his hand slide down Ryan's chest, fingers curling in the hair at the base of his stomach.
Ryan sucked in a breath, heat coiling in his gut. He wanted so much, needed his lover so much. He tipped his head back and tugged Linde closer, moaning when his lover licked up his throat and jaw to his ear.
“I'm going to suck you off now,” Linde whispered.
“Okay,” Ryan squeaked, breathing in heavily, watching his lover kneel in front of him and pull open his pants. He dropped his hand onto Linde's dreads and stroked gently, trying not to thrust when his lover's lips closed wetly round the head of his cock. His tongue flicked over the slit and Ryan groaned, knees weakening with lust. Linde gripped his hips tightly and slid down the length of his erection, hot and wet, tongue working him all the way down.
“God Lily,” he whispered. “So good.”
Moaning, Linde sucked harder, moving his head back, lapping over the tip of his cock and then swallowing him back down. He took Ryan deeply into his throat and swallowed again, the constriction round his cock almost too much for Ryan. He groaned, sensation crashing through his body, heat coalescing in his groin as his balls tightened and his gut clenched.
“Harder,” he muttered, clutching the back of Linde's head tightly, trying desperately not to just fuck his face. Linde swallowed hard again, his tongue sliding against the underside of his cock, suction taking him over the edge. “Oh fuck, Lily,” he groaned, bucking, body shaking as pleasure shot through his groin and he came hard, feeling Linde swallow all around him until he had to pull back with a gasp.
He pulled Linde to his feet quickly and kissed him, delving into his mouth to taste himself mixed with his lover's own sweet taste. He groaned again, pulling Linde closer, sliding his hands up to clutch his neck, stroking his thumbs over the blond's sharp jawline.
“I want you inside me, Lily,” Ryan whispered, pulling back slowly. “I want you.”
“I want you too,” Linde said softly. “Get undressed.”
Ryan quickly stripped off the rest of his clothing and took Linde's hand, pulling him onto the bed and climbing over him. Linde stared up at him in surprise.
“I want you really deep,” he murmured, leaning over to grab the lube and a condom from the bedside table. He handed the condom to Linde and squeezed the slick gel onto his fingers, reaching behind himself.
“Oh God Ryan,” Linde gasped.
Looking down he met shocked, lust-darkened eyes and smiled as he pushed a finger into his body, grunting quietly. As he thrust his finger in and out of his hole, Linde watched, lips parted, tongue flicking out every so often to moisten his lips.
“Lily, condom,” Ryan whispered, pushing a second finger inside himself and groaning quietly at the mild stretch. He worked lube as deep as he could reach, grinning at his lover who scrambled to rip open the condom packet with shaking hands and roll it onto his cock. He rubbed some lube over his cock and Ryan groaned again. He loved watching the blond prepare himself.
Pulling his fingers free, Ryan straightened up, kneeling over Linde, smiling softly at him as the blond watched his face. He shifted forward and Linde held his dick up for him, rubbing it gently at the entrance to his body. Shuddering with tingles of pleasure, Ryan pushed down, impaling himself slowly on his lover's cock, hands clenching tightly in the sheets as he was stretched wide and the length of Linde's erection filled him.
“God, that's good,” he breathed. Linde nodded frantically, hands clenching on his thighs until he was sitting in his lover's lap. He bent over and kissed the blond, thrusting into his mouth with his tongue, moaning as his lover's cock pulled out of him slightly. His lover's hands slid up from his thighs to his back and stroked gently. “I love having you inside me.”
“I love being inside you,” Linde said, rocking up to push back into his body. Ryan gasped, his cock hardening again already with the sensations that washed through him. Sitting back up, he rolled his hips experimentally and Linde bit his lip, breath hitching quietly.
“Feel good?”
“Yes,” Linde said, fingers digging into his back. He sat up, pushing Ryan back slightly. Twisting, Ryan wrapped his legs round the blond's hips and slid his arms round his neck.
“I like this,” he whispered. “I can kiss you more easily.” Linde just smiled and kissed him, tongue slipping straight into his mouth to explore. Moaning, Ryan kissed back hard, sucking on his lover's tongue, rolling his hips up and back, a slow burn of pleasure growing in his ass and groin with every small slide of his lover's dick in and out of his body.
Linde clutched tighter at him, one hand pressing against the small of his back, encouraging his rocking movements the other slid round to his front and wrapped round his erection, jacking him with tight, long strokes that matched the rhythm of their bodies. It was driving him slowly insane.
“Lily,” he whispered against the blond's lips.
“Mmm?” Linde responded quietly.
“I need more, please Lily.” He rocked himself harder against his lover and gasped at the pressure inside his body. Linde groaned and started to jack him faster, pushing up into his thrusts to fill him deeper and harder. Tension built up his spine from the tightness of his belly and pleasure surged through him as Linde somehow managed to hit his prostate just as he twisted his hand round the head of his cock. Ryan cried out, his climax ripping through his body suddenly, electric shocks stabbing him in chest, belly and groin as he spurted into his lover's hand. Linde buried his face in his neck, groaning, licking over the healing bitemark on his shoulder, shuddering into his body until Ryan could feel the warmth inside him.
“Ryan,” Linde whispered, kissing his neck.
“Yeah,” Ryan whispered back. “I know.”
Ryan just couldn't quite tear his eyes off Ville and Bam, the way they were looking at each other, the way they were pressed together and just exuding sex. He could feel the heat of Linde standing next to him, hand sliding slowly down his back to his ass.
“Jesus Bam, don't do that,” he gasped.
“Do what?” Bam asked, not even looking away from Ville. Ryan shifted uncomfortably. “That seduction thing.” He coughed to clear his throat. “It made me want to drag Lily into a stall and that's just weird.”
“Weird how?” Bam laughed as he and Ville slowly moved together.
“Because it's you dude, I told you before, it's a little creepy.”
“It's not creepy Ryan,” Linde said softly from behind him. “Stop fucking in front of us though, that's just unfair.” He suddenly grabbed Ryan's hand and tugged at him. “We'll see you later,” Linde said, pulling him into a stall.
“Lily?” Ryan gasped in shock. Linde just pushed him up against the stall wall and kissing him, sucking at his lips, tongue swiping between them. Groaning quietly, barely aware of the others leaving the bathroom, Ryan gripped Linde's hips, pulling him tight to his, his cock surging against his lover's heat.
“Lily,” he whispered. “What are you doing?”
“What you wanted, besides, you weren't the only one who got turned on Ryan.” Linde rocked up against him with a dark smirk.
“God Lily, I love it when you get like this,” Ryan breathed, pushing a hand between their bodies and cupping his lover's cock through his pants.
“Like... what?” Linde asked, breath hitching.
“So horny you can drag me into a bathroom stall,” Ryan said, gripping tighter and pushing Linde back against the opposite wall, leaning into him to kiss him hard. “Turns me on so much more than Bam and Ville.”
“Good,” Linde laughed, arching into his hand.
Glancing down, Ryan stroked harder, licking his lips as he watched Linde thrust against him. He wasn't at all experience but what he really wanted was to taste the passion he was inspiring.
“Lily?”
“Yeah?”
“Can I blow you?”
Linde jerked harder against him, eyes springing open to fix him with a lustful gaze. “Fuck yes.”
Eagerly, Ryan pulled open his lover's pants, shoving them down slender thighs. He slid his fingers up the hard length and wrapped them round the head, stroking lightly before he slid a fingertip over the slit. Catching Linde's eyes again, Ryan lifted his hand and licked the precome slowly from his finger.
Linde shivered, biting his lip with a groan. “Ryan please,” he whispered.
With a grin, Ryan slid to his knees and stared slightly nervously at Linde's erection. Did he really take that inside him?
“Heila,” Linde whispered softly.
He looked up. “Yeah?”
“You don't have to.”
“No Lily, but I want to.” He smiled up at his lover, wrapping his fist round the base and stroking gently. “Anything I should know?” he asked with a teasing grin.
Linde laughed. “I like a lot of tongue.”
Chuckling quietly, Ryan leaned forward and lapped over the head of his lover's cock. Bittersweet and salt and a faint taste of musk exploded on his tongue, stronger than when he'd licked his finger, and he groaned. Maybe it was because he loved Linde but the Finn tasted so much better than Nathan.
He slid his lips round Linde's cock and sucked experimentally. Linde gasped, hands sinking into his hair, fingers clutching at his scalp. Sliding his tongue down, he licked the soft skin hard, slowly dipping his head lower and swallowing. He couldn't go far, he knew that from blowing Nathan, but he kept sucking and licking, the noises Linde was making, the way he was straining against Ryan's hand on his hip were making his dick jerk painfully against his jeans. He kept bobbing up and down, tightening his lips as Linde started to jerk harder, moaning softly.
“Ryan, almost...” Linde gasped, tugging at his hair. Determinedly, Ryan sank down as far as he could and swallowed hard.
“Fuck,” Linde groaned as his cock pulsed in Ryan's mouth and spurted, hot and wet, down his throat. Gagging, Ryan pulled back quicky and swallowed again. Bam was right, taking a shot in the mouth was going to take a bit of getting used to but with Linde it would be easy.
He was so turned on that he had to sit back on his heels and wrench his pants open, fisting his dick tightly, stroking quickly as he stared up at his lover's face. Linde's eyes, hooded and glazed, stared back, cheeks flushed, lips slack.
“Oh God Ryan,” Linde whispered. “I want to take you home and fuck you.”
Lust surged through his body at the thought of having his lover inside him and he groaned, hand twisting over the head of his cock as he started to come, jerking forward against his lover, pleasure ricocheting through his entire body.
When his breathing had returned to something approaching normal, Linde drew him to his feet and cleaned him off gently with tissue paper.
“Thanks,” he sighed, doing his pants back up. Linde caught his chin and tipped his head up.
“You're so gorgeous,” Linde whispered. “Thank you.” He kissed him gently, dipping his tongue between his lips slowly, licking as if he was searching for his taste in Ryan's mouth. Feeling like his knees might give way from emotion, Ryan clung onto him, kissing back a little urgently.
“We'd better go and find the others,” Linde whispered as he pulled back slowly.
“Only if you promise you will take me home and fuck me later,” Ryan said, smiling as he watched Linde flush and nod. “Good.”
He stepped back and unlocked the door, holding out his hand. Linde took it and squeezed gently and they headed out of the bathroom to go and find the others.
“Can I see what you got?” Linde asked.
Grinning Ryan leaned close to whisper n his ear. “You want to play dress up?”
Linde nodded and flushed, getting to his feet quickly and tugging him up too.
“We'll see you later,” Ryan muttered as he wrapped his arms round the blond and bundled him out of the room.
They scrambled into the bedroom and Linde slammed the door, practically pouncing on him, catching his mouth in a biting kiss, teeth nipping his lips not quite painfully. Ryan gasped, clutching hold of his lover, the sting of his mouth making him harder than he already had been just from the anticipation of being fucked.
Linde stripped him, hands sliding over every inch of exposed skin until he was naked, hard and aching.
“Lily,” he moaned, dragging the blond into an even harder kiss, rocking up against his lover's erection hopefully. Pulling back, Linde shook his head.
“Let me see what you bought.”
“But Lily...”
“Let me see,” Linde repeated softly.
Ryan bit his lip, trying to muster up a little control. “Okay, turn away.”
“What?”
“Turn away, I want you to see the whole thing at once.”
Linde grinned at him. “Okay.” He turned his back and Ryan grabbed the new clothes from the carrier babg, pulling them on quickly and forcing his hard-on into the pants carefully. Scratching the back of his head a little self-consciously, he cleared his throat.
“Okay, I'm ready.”
Linde turned round slowly and stared at him, just stared, silently, for long enough that Ryan started to shift uncomfortably.
“Turn round,” Linde said at last.
“Huh?”
“Turn round heila.”
“Um okay.” Feeling even more self-conscious, Ryan turned his back to his lover and suddenly, hot body was pressed up against his back, Linde's dick digging into his ass, hands sliding round his waist.
“You look so very hot,” Linde whispered, nipping hard at the back of his neck. Cock surging, Ryan tipped his head forward and arched back, pushing his ass hard into Linde's groin.
“Bam said you'd like it.”
“Like it?” Linde laughed, dropping one hand to his groin and cupping his balls. “Thank God you're showing me now, I might be able to control myself when I see you tomorrow.”
He bit his neck again, harder and Ryan groaned, bucking into his lover's touch, the brief pain adding to his desire and need.
“Lily,” he whispered. “Please.”
“Move,” Linde said, pulling him along to the closet and opening the door to reveal the full length mirror inside the door.
“Lily?”
“I want to look at you,” Linde whispered, flushing lightly. He unbuttoned Ryan slacks and pulled out his cock, wrapping his hand round the shaft.
“Oh fuck that's hot,” Ryan groaned, thrusting into his lover's tight grip. Watching Linde's face, his arms round his body, hand on his cock and feeling the pressure of his erection hot against his ass was insanely sexy.
“Lily, baby, I need more,” he groaned. “Please I need more.”
“Do you want me to fuck you, heila?” Linde whispered, licking up his neck and biting down on the rim of his ear. The pain was so good, pushed him into urgent, aching need.
“Yes, fuck yes.”
Linde pulled away suddenly and Ryan whined in disappointment.
“Drop your pants and brace yourself,” Linde murmured, moving round behind him. In the mirror he could see his lover stripping off and rolling on a condom and he hurriedly pushed his pants down, bracing himself on the sides of the open closet.
Long, lean body plastered to his back, Linde kissing his neck and sucking on his skin. “I want you so much,” he whispered.
“I want you too Lily, I need you,” Ryan said, pushing back again, Linde's slick, latex-covered cock sliding against his ass. “Fuck me right now.”
“Ryan...”
“Right now, Lily,” he insisted, reaching back to guide his lover's cock down. “In me, want it.”
“Fuck Ryan,” Linde groaned, thrusting deep inside him in one stroke.
Pain and pressure and heat ripped the breath from his lungs and Ryan barely managed to hold himself upright, clinging to the closet. Linde slipped an arm round his waist, holding him close, panting in his ear and not moving.
“You okay?”
The pain eased to a pleasant burn and Ryan nodded frantically. Only weeks before he would never have guessed how good being fucked could feel, how much he'd love having a cock in his ass and he definitely would never have guessed that he'd enjoy the pain, the burn, the ache afterwards, the sting of biting... who knew he was a pain freak?
He clenched down hard, groaning at the stab of pain through his pelvis, and arched up, twisting his head round so he could kiss his lover. “More than okay,” he panted. “I fucking love it, Lily.”
“Heila,” Linde gasped, jerking into him hard. His hands slid down to Ryan's hips, gripping him. “Hold tight.” He pulled back almost all the way and plunged back into him, deep and hard.
“Yes!” Ryan gripped the sides of the closet tightly, pushing back as Linde's cock stroked in and out of his body. The mirror was angled sideways to them and turning his head, he could watch the blond move against him, see his cock thrusting into his body and the side of Linde's face, flushed, sweating, tight with concentration, eyes glazed. How anyone so fucking sexy could love him was completely beyond his comprehension but he thanked God for it.
Aching with need, groin tight, dick throbbing, he pushed himself back harder and harder.
“Lily, touch me,” he gasped. Holding tighter to one hip, Linde reached round his body and gripped his cock, jacking him with short, hard strokes that had him moaning in seconds. “Oh God Lily, harder, just need...”
Linde shifted and slammed into his body, rubbing over his prostate and Ryan shuddered, heat burning through his body, tension exploding into sudden release, pleasure taking him over as he lost control and nearly fell to his knees, coming hard, shooting into the closet with a hysterical giggle.
“Oh God Ryan,” Linde whimpered, just managing to hold them both up as he came, thrusting jerkily into Ryan's ass.
They slid to the floor, Ryan still laughing at the thought of coming over a closet full of clothes. Linde hugged him and kissed his neck gently.
“Think you'll be able to control yourself tomorrow?”
“It'll be tough, but I think so yes,” Linde said with a tiny snort, nuzzling his ear.
“I think we'd better do some laundry.”
“We? You're the one who came everywhere.”
“And whose fault was that?” Ryan said, twisting his head to kiss Linde smartly on the mouth.
“Yeah, yeah.”
“Let's get up, I should get out of these clothes if I'm wearing them tomorrow.”
“Okay,” Linde sighed, pulling out of his body carefully so they could stand more easily. Kicking off his pants, Ryan turned and pulled the tall blond into his arms, kissing him gently. Linde hummed happily against his mouth, fingers weaving into his hair to draw him closer.
Eventually, he pulled back again so he could take the shirt off and hang it up along with the pants. Bam would not be impressed if he showed up for his wedding in rumpled clothing. He grabbed his boxers from the floor and slipped them on while Linde did the same.
“How was band practise?”
“Really good,” Linde sighed. “The song Ville wrote is just... it's beautiful. Bam is going to love it.”
“He's going to be so pissed with us tomorrow you know that right?” Ryan laughed.
“I know.” Linde smiled softly at him. “But he'll appreciate it all in the end. I love how much you love him.”
Ryan shrugged, feeling oddly, self-conscious. “He's like my brother, you know?”
“Yeah.” Linde reached up and stroked his cheek. “Come on, you have laundry to do.”
“We,” Ryan retorted, slapping his lover's ass gently.
“Hey.”
“Hey yourself.”
“You're lucky I love you,” Linde started with a pout.
“Yeah,” Ryan said quietly, cupping his cheek, emotions making his chest hurt. “Yeah, I am.”
“Oh heila,” Linde breathed, eyes brightening with tears.
Leaning forward, Ryan kissed him gently. “I love you too,” he whispered.
Seeing Bam wrapped up in Ville's and Linde's arms was one of the sweetest things he'd ever seen and Ryan barely held back a grin as he shook his head.
“Oh no, you can't have two, that's just not fair.”
Linde got up off the bed to hug him, grinning. “You know I'm only yours heila.”
His lover's words filled him with an odd combination of shyness and love. “Really?”
“Yeah.”
Very aware of Ville and Bam watching them from the bed, Ryan dragged Linde out and into the other bedroom.
“Only mine?” he breathed, pushing Linde into the door and leaning against him. Slender arms wrapped round his neck and Linde nodded.
“Yeah.”
It was fucking scary how intense it was between them. He didn't really know what to say. They'd got to know each other a little personally and a lot intimately, how could he possibly feel so much for this sweet, tender, sexy man? Was it just the attraction between them that had become electric sex that was making him feel like this or was it the beginnings of love?
“I'm sorry,” Linde sighed, dropping his forehead onto his shoulder.
“No, don't be sorry,” Ryan whispered, stroking the cables of Linde's hair. “Its just really scary, you know?”
“Yes,” Linde said softly, lifting his head to meet his eyes. “I'm scared too you know.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I've never... nothing like this has ever happened to me before.”
“Me neither,” Ryan said. “I don't know...”
There was a knock on the door. “Don't forget you're supposed to be keeping an eye on Ville.”
“We'll be right there dickface!” Ryan shouted angrily, feeling frustrated.
“Good!”
“I'm sorry Linde,” he sighed.
“It's okay.” Linde kissed his cheek. “Let's just go check on Ville, okay?”
“Sure.” He pulled back slowly and brushed Linde's cheek with the back of his hand. The sadness in the blond's eyes made his heart hurt. “I do love you.”
The smile Linde gave him lit his heart as much as it lit his lover's face and he felt a little better. He took Linde's hand and led him back out of the room.
“I wonder what Bam wanted to show Ville.”
Ryan snorted. “I expect we'll find out and in excrutiating detail too.”
“True.” Linde snickered quietly and shifted on the couch to lay his head in his lap. Burying his fingers under dreads to rub Linde's scalp gently, Ryan sighed.
“You okay?”
“Yes, yeah,” Ryan smiled down at the older man. “It's nice to have the place to ourselves that's all.”
“Yeah it is,” Linde smiled back at him. “Migé has been so good to us and Ville and Bam this last month especially with it being so strange to see Ville again. Wonderful but strange.”
“Strange how?”
“He's so different and yet he's the same,” Linde sighed. “It feels like he was never gone in so many ways you know but he's also changed so much. Finding out what happened with Janne, the intensity of his relationship with Bam... he's been our best friend since we were kids and we love him, it feels wrong that we missed so much, weren't there when he needed us.”
“You didn't know...”
“I know but I still feel like we should have tried harder,” Linde said, his expression crumpling.
Ryan pulled the blond up into his arms and held him close, rubbing the back of his neck gently. “He withdrew,” Ryan whispered. “You were all kids Lin' you couldn't have known. It's in the past now, Bam and Ville have helped each other heal. It's okay baby.”
Linde shuddered against him, breath hitching quietly. “I know, I'm sorry.”
“Don't be sorry.” Ryan kissed the top of his head gently. “I love Bam the same way and sometimes there have been things that I wished I'd known were going on with him but he just didn't want me to know for whatever reason.”
Linde looked up, eyes wide and a little reddened. “It's so hard.”
“Yeah it is, but they have each other now and they have us.” He stroked the blond's face but Linde looked even more upset.
“And who do we have?”
Ryan's heart stuttered and he pulled his lover close again. “Lin' please, I don't want to think about that, I know it's selfish but please I can't.”
“I know,” Linde breathed, leaning up to kiss him softly. “Ryan would you...”
“What Linde?”
“Make love to me.”
“You want me to...” his breath caught in his chest and he stopped. Linde kissed him again and nodded.
“Please Ryan.” He got up and held out his hand. “Please.”
Nodding, Ryan took it and stood up, trembling with nerves as he let the older man lead him to the bedroom. Closing the door behind them, Linde turned and kissed him softly, lips moving over his slowly, gradually parting under his mouth. Ryan slid his tongue into the blond's mouth and kissed him back, clutching his cheek gently. The urgency of Linde's kiss was making him desperate for more.
“Lin',” he gasped, pulling back just enough to see beautiful blue-grey eyes. Linde smiled and backed up, pushing his boxers off his hips before sitting on the bed.
“Heila please, I want you.”
Swallowing, Ryan watched the tall, slender blond lie back on the bed and wrap a fist round his cock.
“Oh God,” he whimpered, shoving his shorts down and off, quickly crawling onto the bed to stare at his lover as he jacked himself tight and hard. He was so hot, so beautiful, Ryan wasn't even sure he was going to last long enough to get a condom on, let alone make love to the older man.
“Baby stop,” he whispered, shifting so he was kneeling between long, lean legs.
“What?” Linde looked up in surprise.
“I'm going to come just watching you if you don't stop.”
“Oh.” Blinking widely, panting harshly, Linde let go and lifted his hand to Ryan. “I want you to come inside me.”
“Oh fuck Lily.” Breath hitching, groin painfully tight with need, Ryan leaned on one hand over his lover and kissed him, sweeping his other hand over smooth skin to grip his hip, pushing down to rock his erection into Linde's groin.
Moaning softly into his mouth, Linde thrust back against him, spreading his legs wider. “Please Ryan, I want you in me now.”
Lifting up again, Ryan reached for the everpresent lube and a condom. He knew the theory but he'd never done this before and his hands shook with nerves and anticipation as he squeezed lube onto his fingers. Linde smiled reassuringly and pulled his knees back to his chest to open himself up.
“Oh God,” Ryan breathed, squeezing the base of his dick to control himself. He slid his slicked up fingers between the cheeks of his ass and rubbed gently over the entrance to his body before he carefully pushed one inside. Linde breathed out in a rush and thrust down against him, taking him deep. The heat and tightness was intense and Ryan groaned quietly, stroking his lover until the grip of muscle eased slightly.
“More,” Linde panted, arching up.
Licking his lips, staring at his lover in awe, Ryan nodded and slid a second finger inside the furnace heat of Linde's body.
“Oh yes that's good,” Linde murmured, moving restlessly against him, glazed eyes fixed on him. Ryan stretched and stroked, reaching deeper to try and find his prostate. When Linde groaned and arched up, thrusting against him hard, he knew he'd found it and rubbed again, breathing deeply so he didn't come just watching his lover. He was so close to the edge just from Linde's reaction to him.
“Enough heila, I'm ready,” Linde gasped. “Please, I'm ready.”
Nodding jerkily, Ryan withdrew his fingers and quickly rolled on a condom, adding more lube. Linde might have had more experience than him but he still didn't want to hurt the older man.
“Come here.” Linde reached for him, pulling him down on top of him, guiding his cock down to his ass. Ryan pushed into his lover and groaned, it was even tighter and hotter than he'd anticipated and he bit his lip hard, trying not to lose it.
“Ryan,” Linde bit his neck and licked up to his ear. “Fuck me.”
Lust swept through his body in an urgent wave and Ryan rocked forward, thrusting all the way inside his lover.
“Oh fuck Lily, so hot,” he moaned, reaching down to pull one slim leg up round his waist, holding tight to the back of Linde's thigh, thrusting harder into his lover.
It felt amazing, like nothing he'd ever experienced, so different to being fucked yet just as hot. Just the fact that he was inside Linde was enough to make him want to come straight away but at the same time he wanted it to last as long as possible.
“You feel so good Ryan,” Linde groaned, tugging at him urgently, hands clutching at his hips and as. “Please harder.”
“Fuck,” Ryan muttered, his dick jerking desperately in the heat of his lover and he pulled back further, plunging deep and hard into the blond with a groan of sheer need. He just couldn't hold back, couldn't hold on, need consumed him and he thrust harder and faster, listening to his lover's grunts and gasps and moans. It was the sexiest thing he'd ever heard, even when Linde was fucking him wildly he didn't sound like this.
His groin tightened painfully and he bucked hard, lifting up slightly so he could plunge deeper into Linde and reach between them to grasp his lover's cock, jacking him as best he could. Linde groaned, biting his lip hard as his head dropped back and he shuddered hard, coming over them both.
The clamp of muscles round his dick was almost painful but hurt so good and Ryan dropped his head on his lover's chest, hips jerking into the blond uncontrollably. Linde's fingers scraped down his back and Ryan arched up with a cry, coming hard into his lover, emptying himself with short, shuddering strokes until he collapsed onto Linde with a quiet groan.
“Fuck Lily,” he gasped, kissing the sweaty skin under his mouth.
“Yeah,” Linde murmured, stroking his hair gently. “Now you know why I like it both ways.”
“Oh yes,” Ryan chuckled, nodding against Linde's neck. “Is it always this intense?”
“Only with you,” Linde said quietly.
Ryan lifted his head to stare down at his lover, emotions welling up as he stared into sad eyes. His heart clenched and he bent his head, kissing Linde urgently, clutching him close. Linde gripped the back of his neck tightly, kissing him back with an edge of desperation.
How was he going to leave this beautiful man? He didn't know what he was going to do without Linde but he wasn't like Bam, couldn't just throw himself into a relationship the way he had, didn't know how to just give all of himself to Linde no matter how much he already seemed to feel for him, not after such a short space of time.
He pulled back and buried his face in Linde's neck again so he didn't have to face the pain that he knew the blonde felt too. Long arms wrapped round him, fingers curling in the nape of his neck.
“I love you,” Linde whispered.
“I know,” Ryan sighed. “I know, I love you too.”
“But not enough to come back.”
“Lin'...”
“I'm sorry,” Linde sighed quietly. “I'm sorry, forget I said anything.”
“I can't baby,” Ryan said painfully.
“I know.”
“Not yet anyway,” Ryan whispered, kissing Linde's neck again. Maybe when they knew each other better, maybe if they still felt the same way a few months down the line, but not yet.
“So I've got something to hope for,” Linde said.
“We both have.” Ryan lifted up off his lover, pulling out carefully to get rid of the condom. Then he lay next to his taller lover and pulled him into a tight embrace, stroking his dreads back over his shoulder. “We both have.”
Nodding softly, Linde rested his head on his shoulder and wrapped an arm round his waist.
He was getting used to waking up warm and horny with a hard body pressed to his back and a hard cock pressed to his ass but he wasn't used to waking up close to orgasm, two fingers working his ass and hot mouth wrapped round his dick, sucking him hard.
“Oh fuck,” he breathed, looking down. Dreads were spread over his stomach and hips, beautiful eyes fixed on his face and pink lips were smiling round his cock.
“Oh fuck Lily!” He arched up to push deeper but Linde pulled back, just sucking lightly at the head of his dick, tongue flicking over the tip. “No, Lily, please, I'm so close.”
“Mmm,” Linde moaned, slowly sliding his mouth up and off his cock. “I know,” he said with a grin.
“Don't stop,” Ryan whined, rocking urgently into the strokes of his lover's fingers, his body tight and tense with the need to come.
“Don't worry heila.” Linde grinned wider. “I don't plan on stopping for a long time.” He pushed deeper into Ryan's body, stroking over his prostate. Heat shot through him and Ryan bucked up needily.
“Oh God Lily, please, please,” he moaned, pushing down against his lover's withdrawing fingers. Chuckling quietly, Linde nipped his hipbone and shifted down, pushing his legs back.
“Lily what...” Ryan stopped on a gasp, wet lips sliding down the crease of his groin to suck lightly just under his balls. “Oh fuck,” he breathed, every nerve firing with pleasure, the heat of need spreading through his whole body. “So good Lily, fuck!”
Linde's tongue slipped out to lap harder against his skin, moving lower and lower until he was licking over and around his asshole, hot and slick and electrifying. His cock jerked against his stomach and he reached down to grasp the shaft tightly. He needed to come so badly, Linde was driving him insane. Then Linde pulled back again.
“No!” Ryan howled. “Don't stop, oh God please,” he begged desperately.
“Let go,” Linde said quietly.
“Lily...”
“Let go or I stop touching you.”
Ryan whimpered, he needed desperately. He could get himself off right now but he wanted Linde's touch, tongue, fingers, cock. He let go with a quiet groan.
“Please touch me,” he whispered. Smiling, Linde kissed the inside of his thigh, tongue darting out to slide back up to his groin and over his balls. Slim fingers dug into his hips, thumbs stroking the tops of his thighs and Linde sucked gently on his balls, tongue slipping underneath and pushing hard against his skin.
Shuddering, Ryan spread his legs wider, gripping his lover's dreads desperately. His cock surged, tension building again quickly. One hand left his hip and fingers pushed roughly back into his body in a hard thrust that left him panting and leaking and ready to explode.
“Lily, please,” he groaned, rocking urgently into his lover. “Please, need to come, please.”
But Linde pulled back again, lifting his head and yanking his fingers free in a motion that shot pained pleasure up his spine.
“Not yet,” Linde murmured, kneeling up between his legs.
“You're gonna kill me,” Ryan gasped, eyes tearing up with frustration.
“No, I'm going to fuck you.” Linde rolled a condom down his cock and slowly rubbed lube down the length of his shaft, teasing him even more.
“You're so fucking hot, oh God I need you,” Ryan groaned, beyond desperation now, he just needed his lover over him, inside him, filling him, fucking him.
Eyes dark, a smirk hovering on his lips, Linde leaned over him, pushing his cock down to rub the head over the entrance to his body.
“No more teasing, please,” Ryan groaned. “Please Lily, fuck me please.”
“Are you sure?”
Ryan nearly screamed. “Lily, you've brought to the edge three times and left me hanging, if you don't fuck me right now, I'm going to hold you down, sit on your dick and fuck myself.”
Linde's breath hitched. “Oh Ryan,” he groaned, thrusting into him with one deep, hard stroke that stretched him beautifully.
“Oh God thank you,” he gasped. “You feel so fucking good.” He rocked his hips back then thrust up hard, trying to get his lover deeper.
“Easy heila,” Linde moaned.
“No,” Ryan panted. “I can't, I need you so bad Lily, just fuck me.”
“Yes,” Linde breathed, hips rolling into him, short and sharp and just not quite enough.
“Harder,” Ryan grunted loudly. Linde shook his head and Ryan cried out in frustration. “Lily please harder, please.”
Linde rocked back and slammed into him deep and hard and Ryan cried out again.
“Yes, God Lily, more!”
“Fuck,” Linde gasped, head dropping as he shifted to lean on both hands, one either side of Ryan head, and thrust harder and deeper into him, a relentless assault on his senses that had his dick and groin throbbing in time to the strokes into his body. Every muscle was tight and trembling, every nerve was on fire he was so close, so fucking close.
“Lily, bite me,” he murmured, clutching at his lover desperately. Kissing his chest, Linde slid his tongue across to one nipple, lapping until Ryan was about ready to beg again, then suddenly, he bit down, teeth catching the tight nub sharply. Pain flared through his chest and everything exploded into sheer ecstasy, tension releasing, heat and pleasure sweeping through him, cock jerking against their bodies as he came harder than ever.
“Fuck,” Linde squeaked, bucking hard against him. “Oh fuck Ryan,” he gasped, pushing deep and holding himself taut and tense, shuddering over him. Ryan could feel the heat of his lover's climax even through the condom and he smiled breathlessly.
“Holy fucking shit Lin',” he gasped out, holding on tightly to his lover. Linde licked his abused nipple gently then lifted his head.
“Good morning.”
Ryan laughed again. “A very good morning, that was amazing.”
“Thank you.” Linde smiled at him.
“No, thank you,” Ryan said, still laughing a little breathlessly. “You're such a tease Linde.”
Snorting softly, Linde pulled out of him slowly and got rid of the condom before lying down against him. Ryan wrapped an arm around slender shoulders and pulled him closer, kissing his forehead.
“Damn I can hear the shower,” Ryan muttered.
“It'll be Ville and Bam,” Linde sighed.
Ryan frowned, coming down off such a sexual high he suddenly felt angry and resentful. “You know what? They can fuck any time,” he snapped, pulling away from his lover and quickly pulling on his boxers to storm out of the room.
“Ryan!” Linde called.
Ryan hammered on the door. “Guys, come on, we haven't got all day!” There was silence and Ryan gritted his teeth. “Bam, Ville, you've been in there for fucking ages.”
Linde came up behind him. “Ryan, let them be.”
“But I...”
“Ryan, shut up.” Linde turned him round and pushed him up against the wall, kissing him hard. Groaning, Ryan clutched at his lover, whining when he pulled away. Linde took his hand and led him back to the bedroom.
“What was that?” he asked, sitting the down.
“I don't know,” Ryan sighed, leaning against the blond.
“Really?”
“No.” Ryan rubbed his nose against Linde's neck before lifting his head again. “I... I guess I envy them for what they have.”
“And what you don't have?” Linde whispered.
“What we could have,” Ryan said regretfully.
“We still can heila,” Linde said, expression saddening. “If you give us a chance.”
“I just...”
“Please heila,” Linde whispered. “I know we're going to be apart for a while but please give us a chance.”
“Of course I will Lin',” Ryan said, hugging his lover close. “I want this okay? I want you... I love you.”
“So just stay.”
“I can't Linde, please, please don't make this harder than it already is.”
“Sorry,” Linde whispered, breath hitching a little. “I'm sorry, I just wish this was easier.”
“Me too.” Sighing, Ryan twisted on the bed and wrapped both arms round the older man, kissing him gently. “Please Lin' can we try and enjoy these last couple of days together, make some good memories for when we are apart?”
“Yeah,” Linde nodded. “Yeah, that would be good.”
“Yeah.” Kissing him again quickly, Ryan buried his face in his lover's neck to just hold him for a while.
Ryan shifted off the bed, careful not to disturb his lover. He couldn't sleep, had already been awake for hours, just staring at the beautiful blond he'd lost his heart to.
They were going home in the morning and he really wasn't ready. He couldn't stay but he couldn't face the thought of leaving, and leaving Linde. It just wasn't fair, meeting someone like Linde when there wasn't enough time to make a proper relationship out of it, not quite enough to let him risk his heart and take a leap of faith the way Bam had with Ville.
He wanted to, the thought that the next day he'd be home, that he wouldn't be sleeping beside Linde, waking up with Linde, was tearing him up but it was all too much, too big... too scary.
He went to the sitting room and collapsed back onto the couch with a heavy sigh. He bent over and wrapped his arms round his shins. What was he going to do?
“Ryan? What are you doing up?”
He didn't even look up, just shrugged his shoulders. The couch dipped beside him, an arm slipping round his back.
“Are you okay?”
“No,” Ryan breathed, his emotions suddenly overwhelming him. His chest clenched painfully and his eyes stung. He didn't want to cry over this.
“You want to talk?”
Ryan almost laughed. “No,” he said, slightly hysterically, tears starting to escape against his will.
“Ryan.” Arms tugged him up and round into a strong hug and he lost it, burying his face and crying desperately, clinging on tightly.
“I c-can't, I just can't d-do this,” he sobbed.
“Shh, don't talk yet, just let it out.”
“D-don't want to cry,” he stuttered.
“You might not want to but you might need to Ryan, it's okay. Not like you haven't seen me weep like a baby a few times.”
“Yeah,” Ryan sniffed, laughing a little through his tears. He squeezed his eyes shut and held on as he cried, sobs that wrenched painfully from his chest. When he'd cried himself out, he eased back, sniffing quietly.
“Did you get snot on me?”
Wiping his nose, Ryan half-laughed, breath hitching. “No, I don't think so.”
“Okay good.” Ville smiled softly and wiped the tears from his cheeks.
“Dude.” Ryan pulled away, scrubbing his face roughly. “Don't be so gay.”
Ville raised an eyebrow. “You're kidding right?”
“Uh,” Ryan huffed out a soft laugh. “Yeah sorry.”
“You ready to talk?”
“Do I have to?”
Ville half shrugged. “You're in the gay club now.”
“There's a club?”
“Oh yeah and now you've been initiated you have to talk about your feelings.”
“Shut up,” Ryan snorted.
Ville smiled ruefully. “Seriously Ryan, I'm here for you, just talk to me.”
Ryan looked down at his feet and swallowed back a sigh. “I don't know what to do Ville.”
“What do you want to do?”
“I don't know man, I really don't,” Ryan said quietly. “I don't know if I can leave but I don't see how I can stay.”
“Do you love him?”
“Yes, but I'm scared, you know?”
“Yeah, I know.” Ville grimaced and Ryan patted his shoulder.
“Yeah,” he sighed. “I don't know him well enough, no matter how much I feel for him, and I really do Ville, I do love him. It's just all too much.”
“Well, maybe some time apart will help you guys then,” Ville said softly, stroking his hair back again. “You won't get distracted by anything else and you can just get to know each other. You know there's no reason you can't come back in a few months, Bam and I will be here after all and I know Bam is going to miss you. I'm going to miss you.”
“Yeah same here. What made you decide to move in the end Ville? You and Bam had fights over this.”
“I don't know really,” Ville said with a soft smile. “I was resistant for a long time because I was scared and because I didn't want to lose Bam or my mother.”
“But?”
“But Bam decided he could move here too and not so long ago I had a serious talk with Mom about what I was going to do with my life and she told me I should do what makes me happy. I still feel bad sometimes though, leaving her behind.” Ville patted his shoulder. “But we're not talking about me.”
Ryan sighed. “I know. I just... I avoided thinking about it as much as I could and now it's all hit me at once. I know going home and Linde and I getting to know each other better is the sensible thing but it doesn't make me feel any better about leaving him.” He shrugged and leaned against Ville who hugged him close again.
“Trouble is, I don't see how moving here would work.”
“Well, why wouldn't it?” Ville asked quietly.
“What would I do for a start? I wouldn't be able to contribute.”
“But if you love him...”
“Ville,” Ryan sighed resignedly. “Sometimes love isn't enough.” He stood up and patted his slightly shell-shocked looking friend on the shoulder. “I'm going to go back to bed, thanks for listening Ville.”
Ville frowned. “Anytime, I mean it.”
“I know man.” Ryan forced a smile and quickly headed back to the bedroom, shucking off his boxers and climbing into bed as carefully as he could. Linde snuggled close, slipping an arm round his waist and kissing his cheek.
“Better now?”
“Not really,” Ryan sighed. “How are you?”
“I don't know.” Linde lifted his head to look at him, his expression sad, eyes full of misery. “I just don't know.”
Reaching up, Ryan cupped his lover's cheek and stroked a thumb over his mouth. “I'm gonna miss you.”
Linde's eyes squeezed shut, face screwing up as he nodded rapidly. “M-me too.”
“Lily,” Ryan breathed, pulling him into a soft kiss. Linde whimpered quietly, clutching at him, moving as close as he could, lips parting under his. Ryan swept his tongue into his lover's mouth, tasting him urgently. He dragged Linde over on top of him, gripping the back of his neck with one hand and his ass with the other, rocking up against his lover as need and desperation tightened his groin and hardened his dick.
Moaning, Linde kissed him deeper, thrusting back against him, the hot length of his cock rubbing against Ryan's own erection.
“Oh God Lily,” Ryan gasped. “I don't know... how I'm going to leave you.”
Linde hushed him quietly, kissing him again. He dropped his legs down to either side of Ryan's and arched up, rocking his hips hard and fast. Ryan watched his lover in awe and lust and regret, holding on tightly as pleasure peaked in his groin and he came, a moan tearing itself from his throat. He bit back more tears, watching Linde's face as he shuddered and gasped, hot blast of come shooting over his stomach.
“You are so beautiful, Lily,” Ryan said quietly.
“Don't go,” Linde whispered, eyes filling with tears.
“Lin'...”
“Don't go, please.” Linde's face crumpled and he dropped down on top of Ryan, crying against his shoulder.
“I have to,” Ryan whispered. “I'm sorry baby.”
“I know,” Linde sobbed. “I know, I'm sorry too.”
Ryan held his lover, stroking his back and kissing his temple until he calmed and then his breathing gradually slowed to sleep. He didn't care that they'd probably stick together, he just wanted these last few hours of feeling Linde's warm body on his, breath against his skin, hair trailing over them both. It wasn't like he was going to be able to sleep anyway, he might as well make as many memories as he could. He was going to need them.
@>*~